Ah, Life. Precious Life. When you teach people that life is always happening FOR them, when you preach that saying YES to what’s aligned and difficult is key and when you ask Life to bring you experiences to learn deeper, more extreme surrender, you have to understand that IT (Life, The Great Something, The Universe, God) will say YES to YOU. You’ll get to walk through the fire. You will grow.
So, lemme tell you about my 2018. My “tests.”
And, the miracle space, which I’m writing my book about. Yes, my book, soon to be complete.
Oh, and let me mention that I also teach how you should never, ever disappear from your tribe for a week, let alone 8 months. But sh*# happens. Nothing like life experiences to solidify your teaching or shift it. 😉
So, where have I been?
Let me start at the beginning. There’s a lot to tell you, but I’ll try to summarize it as best I can.
Back in November/December of 2017, I was trying hard to breathe new life into my coaching business. Nothing felt right. No money was flowing. Coaching felt heavy. And then the strangest thing happened. I got an intuitive “hit” or knowing that I was supposed to go back east to “be with” my mother. When the idea came, it was strong, aligned and sure. But I was living in CA, trying to pop open my business. I was living in someone’s home as a roommate. I normally saw my mother once a year so it’s not like it was urgent. In fact, it didn’t feel urgent. It just felt aligned and sure. That’s all I knew.
I pushed it away for a while but the idea, urging, prompting, stayed in my consciousness. So, one day I sat down with my roommate, also an intuitive, and told her what I had “gotten.” I remember her looking at me and smiling. She just said, “I know.”
We briefly talked about how I had family healing to attend to and in going back to be with my 87 year old mom, I would complete that chapter and create a clear space to “move on.” My roommate was also dating someone and they had decided he was going to move in, just when I needed to move out. Talk about the Universe conspiring on our behalf! So, over the next 2 months, I prepared. I started packing. My inner guidance told me to sell all of my furniture and put everything in storage. I prepared to drive back east. The time frame was also becoming clear. I was to leave the beginning of February. I put my business and all of my masterminds on hold and stopped everything except my Facebook Lives.
There were days I still questioned this move yet felt the “peace that passes all understanding” in my heart. My mom and I talked and she had also gotten the feeling I was to come home. The holidays came and went. I was excited, a bit nervous and stressed but obeyed my inner guidance, like I always do. I say YES to what feels aligned, even if I don’t understand; even if it seems to make no sense. And that was SO true in this case.
I got a call from a friend early in January, who felt I was perfect for a coaching position within her company. I wasn’t sure where I was headed and needed income so I said yes to a 4 day trip to DC to explore the company and be interviewed. I also had a flight planned immediately afterward, to San Antonio, to complete a mastermind I had been in for months. However, I felt a deep urge to leave the group. It was no longer aligned with me. So I did and there I was, “stuck” with a flight to San Antonio with no reason to go. That is, until I remembered that Joe Vitale and I had planned to have dinner while I was there. So, I let him know I was specifically flying to San Antonio for our dinner. He agreed we should keep the date.
January was exhausting; packing, moving and making arrangements. Flying to DC and then, to San Antonio. The possible job in DC was at first, very much aligned. I passed the first interview. But within a short time, I felt it fall out of alignment and so, it never materialized. It would’ve been a well-paying job and one where I could really utilize my coaching and speaking skills. But it would’ve taken me away from my own mission, the one that wasn’t happening at the moment. Because I believe everything happens for a reason, I had peace about it. My dinner with Joe was spectacular. We had a deep and soulful connection which was a continuation of what we felt on our summit interview. We also had lots in common. We ended up talking about me writing that book I tried writing for 25 years but never completed. He said he would guide me and then, to stay accountable and moving, I picked a date to get him my first 3 chapters.
The Universe was massively guiding my life through a series of ongoing synchronicities as I said YES and stepped in. Little did I know everything was set in motion and about to unfold.
After my trip to San Antonio, I packed my car and headed toward PA to “be with” my mom. Joe and my sister were constant companions, checking in to be sure I was safe. About halfway through my trip, my sister called with an important message.
“Just got back from the doctors office. Mom’s been diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer.”
That was the moment it hit. The Universe knew EXACTLY what it was doing. Mom was dying. I was being given a huge, priceless gift of time with my mom. And because I said YES, I would be left with beautiful memories and completion that I wouldn’t have had if I had ignored the call.
I had planned to stay in PA for about 3 months, so I took little with me. The next several months were a blur. I settled into a bedroom at my mother’s home. We spent precious time talking and reminiscing. My daughter came for a visit. Mom had breast cancer in her body for 3 years and chose not to do anything about it. It was now taking over the outside of her body as well.
My 3 month stay ended up being 6. Those 6 months were filled with love, joy, tension, fear, sadness, anger, exhaustion and more as my sister, brother and I dealt with mom, the doctors and her care. And crazy as it may seem, during the entire time my mother was dying, I found myself living in the miracle space I’m writing about in my book. I actually found time to write every morning to stay accountable to my timeline with Joe. I completed my first 3 chapters early and ended up sending him the first 5. Through even more synchronicities and miracles, Robert Clancy (whom I had interviewed on one of my past summits) was lead back to me and we ended up with a cable TV show (“The Mindset Reset Show”) that literally fell into our laps. I bought the necessary equipment and we began interviewing for the show’s 2 year run.
I found myself in a gratitude space I never knew existed. I used what Joe calls “nevillizing” (“feeling it real”) to manifest many things into my life. I lived in a perpetual state of overwhelming love and gratitude while in the midst of one of the most challenging times of my life. I had miracles show up daily that were unbelievable. The reminiscing phase with mom ended quickly and went into a phase of caring for her and her wounds 24/7 until hospice was called in. I held it together amazingly well but was unable to do much else business-wise, as I dealt with my own aching body and heavy emotions. My precious angels, Robert and Joe, emotionally supported me throughout the entire ordeal. Without them, I’m not sure how I would’ve made it. My sister and I also became much closer. Mom passed on May 1, practically in my arms. I was sad when she left but relieved she was no longer in pain. I knew she wanted to be with my dad, who had been gone for almost 8 years. And because I had said YES to the unknown, I felt complete.
I stayed in PA through the sale of mom’s house. I continued to process my emotions, write and produce the show. Through the months, my friendship with Joe evolved and we were inspired to collaborate on many new projects. I flew to Austin a few times to work with him, but that was becoming costly and inconvenient. Through conversations with Joe and asking and carefully listening to my inner guidance, I was led to drive back to CA, pick up my stuff and move to Texas to be close to him in order to move forward with our ideas.
So, here I sit, writing from my little townhouse in the Austin area.
I’m still processing driving about 7200 miles within the last 6 months. Closing my business. Caring for my dying mother and then, burying her. Relocating to Texas after over 30 years in San Diego. And starting my mission and career yet again, at the tender age of 59. I marvel at how time has stood still in all of this. How my dad lets me know he’s close by sending tiny feathers. How my parents show up as orbs and dance across my screen during Facebook Lives and our show. I am blown away by the strength and resiliency of the physical human body and courage of the spirit. I learned so much about my mother and myself during our time together. I miss my best friend but now, she is my guardian angel and is extremely busy watching over me from the other side. It’s hard to be sad, although sometimes I am. Whenever something important happens, I miss picking up the phone and sharing it with her. Then I realize, she’s hearing and seeing it all. She’s probably responsible for creating some of it! Even though I miss my physical mom, she is absolutely NOT absent from me. So, all I can do is remember her with extreme love and gratitude. I am blessed for the final months we spent together.
And I’m still in awe of the magic and miracles throughout our every day if we’re awake and aware enough to see them. Joe Vitale is one of my best friends and we’re collaborating together. He’s also supporting me with my book and more. What? I can’t wrap my head around it so I don’t even try. I just stay in an extreme state of gratitude and continue to move forward.
This can all happen for you, too. How?
The first and most important piece is practicing daily gratitude.
Stay open, awake, aware and in connection with your inner wisdom.
When you feel inspired or get a hit to act, when you know it’s aligned, SAY YES.
Surrender to the process and trust. Take the first step.
Even if it makes no sense.
And BELIEVE that miracles and magic can happen for you.
I’m living proof.
You won’t believe the many gifts waiting for you if you do.
PS – And stay tuned, things are happening and I don’t want you miss any of them! You will soon be invited to my ONE-DAY EVENT(happening Saturday, October 27th here in the Austin area) which will include two, very special guests AND boy, do I have a book for YOU! My book, “YOUR TURNING POINT – How to Break Free from a Life of Limitation and Break through to a Life of Miracles,” is being released this fall. You’ll definitely want a copy!